The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an
urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the
employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered,
"Hello?"

Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster
the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?"

"Yes", whispered the small voice.

"May I talk with him?" the man asked.

To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."

Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"

"Yes", came the answer. "May I talk with her?"

Again the small voice whispered, "No".

Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home
alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person
who should be there watching over the child. "Is there anyone there
besides you?", the boss asked the child.

"Yes" whispered the child, "A policeman."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss
asked, "May I speak with the policeman"?

"No, he's busy", whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?, asked the boss.

"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered
answer.

Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a
helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is
that noise?"

"A hello-copper", answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed.

In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just
landed the hello-copper."

Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss
asked, "Why are they there"?

Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle,
"They're looking for me!"

The Tomato Garden:

An older Italian gentleman lived alone in New Jersey. He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was very hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:’’

Dear Vincent, I am feeling pretty sad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I am just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know that if you were here to help me that my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days. Love, Papa

A few days later he received a letter from his son:

Dear Papa, Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried. Love, Vinnie

At four AM the next day FBI agents and the local police arrived and dug up the entire area with out finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. Later that same day the old man received another letter from his son:

Dear Papa, Go ahead and plant the garden now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances. Love Vinnie.

For the ladies:

Porn for Women

It is done. My daughter did a wonderful job. My hair hasn't been this short since that day in tenth grade (1968) when Sister Mary Corona sent me home because my hair touched my collar.

Gosh

It's really, really nice to hear from our resident gentlemen. (Ded and Pete, that would be you, lest there be any doubt!) Just what this old henhouse needed--a couple of roosters!

it is just a little frightening

Good afternoon, friends.

I have had the same hair style for almost forty years. (I admit a year or so with a fro, but that was an anomaly) Due to a lot of broken and split ends, the length has stayed about the same since my last haircut, which was in the fall of 2005. The truth is that my hair has been rapidly thinning for the last few years, and it will no longer stay in my trademark pony tail.

My older daughter is a very successful hair stylist, and I have made an appointment with her for next Sunday. We will all go out to breakfast and then to her shop and she is going to cut my hair short. I have put myself in her hands. We will be taking before and after pictures, so watch this space.

::edited the picture back in::

I do hope

That you in the midwest and south are all Ok I have just been watching the news about the tonados