Thursday, December 31

Aloha Rocky Road

Okay, I know I'm not supposed to eat mass quantities of candy but it's New Year's Eve and the ending of a crappy year so I bought this "Aloha Rocky Road" at the store -- basically rocky road but with macadamia nuts -- and I have to say it was one of the best frigging candies I've ever, ever eaten. I ate the whole package. It was about the size of 1.5 decks of cards.

Daaaaamn good stuff.

HAPPY 2010!!!!

new year's eve has arrived!

welcome 2010... goodbye 2009.

may the new year for all of us be bright and happy!

Sunday, December 27

2010 Resolutions

I haven't made new year resolutions in years but, I'm making one this year. I have friends that I've known for years who, based on depth of friendship, are more than acquaintances but who never contact me. I'm always the one to initiate contact to get together, etc., and while they're always happy and receptive, they never initiate.

So, my 2010 resolution is to stop contacting them. If they're interested in maintaining the friendship, they'll contact me. If they don't, then it's for the best.

Any of you making new year resolutions?


Now that Christmas is behind us, we all have 2010 ahead of us.
Of course you already know that. :)

So, what are your plans for New Years Eve?

Me.... Bigjoe and I stay in. We buy a steak and lobster tail. Maybe some shrimp and prepare the feast. A bottle of wine and a movie. Nice and safe.

Thursday, December 24


I have to say, the concept of addiction has always puzzled me. I've never been able to fathom not being able, or just not wanting, to live without something. I mean, don't get me wrong, there are things that I really, really, really don't want to live without but they're things like a washer and dryer, electricity, clean water, etc.

But, tonight I had an incident where I felt a twinge of what it must be like to be an addict. As you all know, I'm diabetic. The single worst problem I've struggled with have been severe leg and foot cramps which are so painful that I had stopped doing a lot of things because of the fear of these cramps. Unfortunately, curbing the activities that I KNOW cause them didn't make them go away completely, it just reduced the incidents.

Then, several months ago I started taking a daily multi-vitamin which claims to be formulated specifically for diabetics. I started taking them because I figured that as I'm getting older, it couldn't hurt to supplement my vitamins, didn't even think about the cramps. But within a few weeks of starting to take them, remarkably, I noticed that I was no longer getting the cramps. At all. Ever. As a result, for the first time in my life I take something faithfully. I'm better about taking the vitamins than I am my diabetes medication.

The vitamins are kinda hard to find so when I find them, I buy everything they have. Well somehow, with work being crazy, the holidays, etc., I ran out on Tuesday. They've been on my list of things to do all week but I kept forgetting. So, tonight I thought of it and ran out to get them before I forgot. I got to the drugstore that I know carries them and . . . went up and down the vitamin aisle four times and . . . they weren't there and, I started having a little bit of a panic attack. I started feeling this crazy anxiety about not being able to find them and how will I get through the rest of the week without them, etc., and about two heartbeats from being really upset I thought I'd check the diabetes care aisle and . . . there they were. Apparently they just moved them. They ahd six boxes and I bought all of them.

Whew. Crisis averted.

Addition stinks.

Punishing good deeds

my story isn't as good as Spidey's, but here goes:

I was at the store earlier getting last minute "oh crap, i forgot that!" stuff. The store was packed. The lines started at the front and went all the way back and the whole place looked like a bomb went off. Everyone was polite and helpful though. At one point, Mandolin started shouting "Santa Clause! Santa Claus!" and poiting at an older gentleman. The man smiled really big and puffed his chest up, and walked towards Mandolin like he was about to make her day (bless his heart). Little did he know of her complete fear and utter hate of all things Santa. Mandolin screamed bloody hell and attempted to climb my body like a cat climbing a tree. I don't think I'll ever forget the look on that man's face.

angels from heaven

this morning after getting my food prepped for this afternoon, i had to go outside. the shoveling was not an option. lots of snow in the driveway and lots piled up at the end. there would be no getting out. so bigjoe and i grabbed the little snow blower(the big one broke a belt) and the shovels and headed to the end of the driveway to dig our way out. a few shovels later i looked up and coming down the street was a snowplow. behind the wheel a smiling face. the man drove up and said, do you want me to clean that out for you? wow, i said.. that would be great! so we stepped back and he took a few swipes, clean as can be! bigjoe said.. thanks! what do I owe you? he smiled and said... nothing, just take a business card and call me if you need some work done. he was a carpenter! (jesus was a carpenter!)
bigjoe said.... nope, you just saved us lots of work. have a tip!

and so i say... angels appear in all different forms. especially at christmas!

Merry Christmas friends!

Merry Christmas

The weather here is crappy--icy and all.
I hope where you are it's nice and pleasant.
Happy Christmas to you and yours.

Brazil Boy
This "Brazil Boy" story is heart wrenching and I'm glad the Brazillian courts finally did the right thing and returned the boy to his father.
I hope the boy adjusts and he and his father have a great relationship.

Tuesday, December 22

Festive Holiday Music from Juniper Creek!

For your holiday pleasure, the musical stylings of Roman and Adaleen Grant and the whole Juniper Creek gang (and don't miss the best song--"Silent Wife"):

Opinion, please . . .

When my nephew turned driving age, my brother stupidly bought him a brand new Nissan truck and, within a week he had hit my brother's car. Within 45 days he had hit a couple of other things so the passenger side of the truck is just all scraped up. My brother has since taken the truck away from Crash (as I now call him) and he is having it fixed and then he is selling it.

When I got the MB from my aunt, my brother asked if I wanted to sell my other car to him for Crash since the car is 5 years old and he doesn't want to get Crash a new car. Made sense so I said okay.

I looked up the value of my car and, given the mileage (which is significant -- 140,000) and the condition, the low KBB is $8K. So, I told my bro I'd sell it to him for $4K. I decided that I would take it in and have it serviced -- oil change, etc. -- before selling it and the garage just called and said that it needs new catalytic converters. Without them, it won't pass smog for the sale but, it's $2,100 to fix them.

So, the question I have is do I:

1) Tell my bro that he can still have it at $4K but he's going to have to pay for the repair since he's getting a good price;

2) Offer to still give it to him for $4K and split the $2K repair with him; or

3) Sell it to him for the $4K and pay for the $2K repair myself.

When I mentioned to the repair guy that I was selling it to my bro for $4k (he knows my bro, our whole family take their cars there) the guy said that was such a great deal for the car that Bro should pay for the repair and be happy.

What do you think?

New Marketing Slogan?

Why is it that I can have area rugs all over my house but if I put one in the bathroom, Jack will poop on it? I can have a rug somewhere in the house forever and nothing . . . move it to the bathroom and within a day, poop.

The interesting thing is, the only rug he hasn't yet pooped on is one that I bought from Orbie. I had it in there alone for a month, no poop. Thinking (stupidly since he's been doing this for the 8 years I've had him) that maybe he had stopped, I put another rug in there with the Orbie rug, poop. But not on the Orbie rug. I took the other rug out and threw it away and the Orbie rug has been in there alone for about a month and, no poop.

It's nice to know that Jack has good taste and the decency not to foul the lovely Orbie rug but, it's curious.

So, I don't know that you'd want to use it as a slogan but a couple of phrases come to mind:

"So nice that a cat won't poop on it"
"It's cat poop proof!"

Or something . . .

Good News

I got a Christmas Card from Ded, he's doing well and wonders how I got Ed Bear to dress as Santa. Having met Ed Bear, I know that if I'd asked him to dress as Santa for my daughter, he'd do it in a heartbeat. Thanks to everyone who sent me a card and I hope Bert turns up soon.

Sunday, December 20

Wedding video and pictures (so Urbles can see;)

So here's a link to our video which Sean uploaded to YouTube and it also has a slide show of all the pics:

Enjoy! ;)

Saturday, December 19

Name Calling . . .but not to her face. . . In search of a Christmas Post

"Granted I know that calling the Two Faced Backstabbing Cunt Bitch isn’t very Christlike, but I don’t call her that to her face. I try to act civilized when I’m around her because she is having a hard time being civil toward me and I am a better person than she is."

I checked out the other site for the first time in awhile and this made me laugh.
I don't see how being "civilized" to someone's face while calling her a Two Faced Backstabbing Cunt Bitch behind her back is being very Christlike (if being Christlike is the aim here.) Someone please explain the logic.

Friday, December 18


left me a present in my mailbox today. it is a lovely scarf that someone made. thank you jilly. :) lovely and thoughtful. also, thank you for the card and picture.

Tuesday, December 15

I'm hitched!

So I am an old married lady! The wedding was actually really nice including the dinner. Everyone seemed to have a good time and we had around 20 people including us there. I wish my mom could have been there but most of my best friends made it so I am happy :)

Here's a pic of me before the wedding:

And one of Sean and me after:

Sunday, December 13

Guilty Pleasure

I don't watch a lot of TV it's mostly background noise to me, and usually set to something like Sesame Street. However, there is one show I love to watch if it's on when I'm the one flipping the channels. I love Shatner's Raw Nerve on Bio. Today I saw some of his interview with Rush Linbaugh. Shatner asked that man several questions I've been wanting to ask him for years. For example, at one point Shanter said "Well, how do you know you're right?" Then later, he put Rush on the spot and asked him why he had to yell, curse and threaten people. Shatner asked Rush why he couldn't just be academic and intelligent and calmly present an argument without being a snake-oil salesman. It was fantastic. After a bit I just couldn't take Rush anymore, so I had to turn the TV off, but if you get the chance, watch this episode, it's a good one.

Saturday, December 12

Sanity Check

I think it's safe to assume you should doubt your sanity when you find yourself singing to food. As y'all know, I'm diabetic and, as you may not know, there are certain foods that I can't trust myself around. They are: orange juice, blood orange soda, and sparkling apple cider. So, if I buy them to take to a function, I have to keep them locked in the car or I will drink myself into a coma.

I currently have a four pack of sparkling apple cider in the car and when I was getting out of the car just now, and getting groceries out of the back, I spied the four pack sitting there on the floor and a Beatle song popped into my head . . .

I want you.
I want you so baaaad.
I want yooooooou.
I want you so bad it's driving me mad.
It's driving me mad.

So I was, in essence, singing to food.

An observation

If Barbara Walters is right and Lady Gaga, Sarah Palin and nutjob Glen Beck are among the most fascinating people of 2009--then this country is going down the crapper.

twas 2 weeks before christmas

give a day or two. are you ready?

me..... no

Wednesday, December 9

thank you

to those who have sent me a christmas card. a sweet surprise in the mail box. :)

There's Always an Exception

I don't like long hair on men. In fact, I have a thing for balding men but . . . there's always an exception. This guy is: a) beautiful; and b) the only man who should be allowed to have long hair.

Monday, December 7

Santa: Terrorizing kids

since 1881

Sunday, December 6


I have to say, I love this video:

It makes me like Jeff Fisher.

For those of you who don't know who this guy is, he's the Head Coach for the Tennessee Titans. When this was made the Titans were 0 - 6, hadn't won a game. Since this video they won their next 5 games but that winning streak came to an end today when the Colts beat them for the second time this season.

Oh, and the Colts are undefeated this year.

Gotta love a man with a sense of humor.

Wednesday, December 2

poop bear

we were sitting at the table eating together yesterday when Mandolin pointed at a picture of winnie the pooh on her yogurt and said "look daddy, it's poop. I like that poop bear." I started laughing, because it's funny. My guy decided to deal with it by insisting that she said it right and then they got in the "pooh bear" vs. "poop bear" fight. A long time ago I decided that I refuse to fight with a baby/young child. If she wants to call it poop bear, more power to her. She's 2, if you get into a power struggle over something like a name, you've just become two yourself. I have other things I'd rather do, like laugh with her about someone naming a bear poop. It is a funy name for a bear after all.

Tiger's Old News

Meredith Baxter-Birney (Elyse on Family Ties)
at age 62 and three marriages has come out of the closet. She said she finally realized a few years ago that she was a lesbian.
Do you think she didn't know all this time, or that she just finally met someone who she loved and who gave her the courage and strength?
Do you think someone can live their whole life without actually knowing their sexual preference?

Listen up, Tiger:

A few notes to married celebrities who screw around on their wives:
1. The news is going to get out--next month or next year--but it will get out.
2. The mistress/girlfriend is going to save your voice mails and texts and sell her story to a tabloid or gossip magazine or tabloid tv.
3. They will not erase said voice mails or texts just because you ask them to do you a favor.
4. If the actual mistress doesn't squeal, she'll have told her mother or sister or or brother or girlfriend and they sell the story--those stories pay more than most people earn in a year.
5. They owe you no loyality, after all you show no loyality to your wife and family, why should any be shown to you?

tiger... tiger

what are you up to?
not too smart to leave voice messages on your hoochies cell phone.

Saturday, November 28

will durst

bigjoe and i had an enjoyable evening at a comedy show with will durst as the headliner. he is from wisconsin and he does a show when he comes home for thanksgiving. it was great.

Friday, November 27

Anyone heard from Schell?

Her blog's been quiet and was just wondering if she's okay.

What's in a Name?

We spent some time watching BBC America yesterday and caught a preview for a Top Model program in England where all the models have a disability (most are missing a limb apparently). It's a unique idea for a show, but the name of the show is as tacky as all get out. They call it "Britian's Missing Top Model." Missing. Of all the ways to describe someone with a disability, missing isn't how I'd do it. When they said "Britian's Missing Top Model" I had no idea wtf they were talking about and then spent a moment taking in the concept of the show. Maybe they refer to people with disabilities as "missing" in England? I don't know, but if they try and have a season of that here, they'll have to think of a new name. When I heard "missing" and "model," I thought of that succubus Nancy Grace.

Time and the Daily Mail have written some interesting articles about the show if you do a search. The show is over in the UK, so if you just want spoilers, they're out on the Internet.

Paul McCartney

I watched a recording of Paul McCartney: Good Evening New York.
Whataguy. I shall love him until Mems tells he that he's a wanker who exploits people and things ala Sting and Bono.
He also looks like he's the same weight as when the Beatles invaded the US over 40 years ago

Thursday, November 26

Nothing like that cold crunch to give the turkey a zing

I have two best friends. BF1 and BF2. BF2 is the nicest person you'll ever meet, but she doesn'talways think. BF1 and BF2 decided that since I'm sick again, they're going to cook the dinner at my house using all the stuff I bought. It was a sweet gesture and reminded me why they're my best friends. The hitch? BF2 (who doesn't always think) decided to cook the turkey the Alton Brown way, but only followed half his directions. Moreover, she didn't keep in mind that we're eating at 3. It's 2 and the turkey is a nice shade of char brown and she says the turkey will be just fine. Moreover, BF1 and BF2 decided to make all of the side dishes at 1. All of the food is ready and it's 2. People won't be here until 3ish and then don't expect toeat until 3:30-4. It looks like we're having a cold and crunchy day. But I am thankful that I didn't have to cook it and that they love me enough to make and serve cold-crunchy food.


Here's hoping you all have plenty to give thanks for and the
time to enjoy the day.

Gobbble Gobble Gobble.

Wednesday, November 25

Sonic Commercial

I have to say, that Sonic commercial where the couple is in the car talking and the husband says that the sweater he's wearing is from the sixth grade and she says, "Why do you have the same body that you did in sixth grade?" cracks me up.


Now here are some fine American Sarah Palin supporters who should make Bert very proud to be an American! I know *I* am.

Tuesday, November 24

Gross Eat

My daughter is underweight for her age. She basically prefers to live off of yogurt (it must have splenda in it) and fresh fruit and veggies. I've found a few fat building foods she'll eat, but it's been a struggle. Anyway, today I was putting gifts into boxes when I heard the kitten make an odd noise. Upon further inspection I found Mandolin and the dog I dogsit sitting by the kitten's food dishes and drinking his water from his dish and eating his food. Apparently Mandolin loves and i mean loves kitten food that's been soaked in a bowl of water. Her little cheeks were chipmunk fat they were so full. My first reaction was to vomit, but I held off and went with my second reaction, which was a whole lot of corner standing time with some ranting about how nasty eating cat food is. I called her daddy to tell him about it and his response was: "Well, it's got fat and protein, so she'll gain weight." She hasn't put anyhting gross in her mouth in almost a year, she doesn't even eat off the floor/ground. I pray nothing ever happens to me, or Mandol will turn in to a wild little hellcat with no social skills like Nell: "tay in the wind."

Monday, November 23

adam lambert

was a piggy on the AMA show. did you see it?

Beauty Queens

There is a "beauty queen" on The Amazing Race and she's awful---whiny, demanding and over-the-top--blaming her husband-team member for everything.
I can't think of a beauty queen that I've ever liked. Remember Annts?--She loved pageants and beauty queens.

Have you ever liked a beauty pagenat queen?

Saturday, November 21

Potluck Ideas

We're having a pot luck at work on Tuesday and I pulled "Main Dish" but can't think of what to bring. It's a hard category cuz it kinda has to be something that is good at room temperature.

Any ideas?

For Emma

Merry Christmas a little early

I'm Done

with my Christmas Shopping. Now I just need to go buy food for this Thursday.

Friday, November 20

Friday Reads

On Twitter, every Friday is Friday Reads day, where people tell (in 140 characters) what they're reading. My #fridayreads is Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn. It's an older book, about a fragile, hard-drinking woman reporter who returns to her creepy hometown to cover the murder of some girls. It starts out and you think it's going to be breezy detective lit, but turns into something else. Hard to put down. What are you reading?

Wednesday, November 18

Tee hee...

You say you enjoy "humor"? And you enjoy "grammar"?

Tuesday, November 17

Pale Palin

I watched the Big O's interview with Palin (I thought of you Spidey).
That woman (Palin, not O) is a blamer. Nothing was ever her fault---it was McCain's, it was Obama's people, it was the handlers, it was the media, it was Katie Couric's.

For a Rogue Maverick, she sure whined a lot.

Example of her passive-aggressiveism:
She sarcastically referred to Levi Johnston as "Ricky Hollywood" and his "path to porn" and yet she said he was welcomed to Thanksgiving and she'd pray for him.

I got a note from Ded

Must've been a couple of weeks ago. Said he was about to get his computer problems fixed and get back to his friends here in Internet-land.

So where are you, Ded? We're waiting!

Sunday, November 15

and it begins!

the holiday season is upon us! christmas carols are playing on the radio station.
don't fight it! embrace it! let the spirit move you!

i am going to start my christmas cards today. i am going to start making my list for who has been naughty and nice and forwarding it to santa. i am going to stay on top of my christmas game and start my shopping soon.

but no... i am not baking cookies.

Thursday, November 12


"Paying taxes isn't like going to the zoo. It's twenty dollars to get in and you don't get to haggle the price to $18.50 because you don't like zebras."

Jon Stewert has a good point about taxes. My taxes pay for a lot of shit I dislike, like penis pumps for old dudes), but I don't go after such things and tell old men they can't have a penis pump.

We've been fighting about health care and abortions rights tonight and I'm sad, tired, and sick.

I need to stop talkig to people who I know I disagree with.

Okay, time to make a new post

What's up wit chu?

Monday, November 9

"Tis the Season

First sighting of a yard with Christmas lights and tree: today at 5:43 PM.

Isn't someone rushing the season just a tad?


Because all you old (and young) broads are my friends I wanted to let you know...

Sean and I are gettin' hitched! Yep, it's true, we will be going to Vegas next month; he asked me yesterday and we went and looked at rings and such. It's going to be small and mellow, I'm going to find a pretty dress to wear, probably a silver one and it'll just be family and a few friends.

Anyway, thought some good news might be welcome so I wanted to share with you all. :)

Saturday, November 7


i am happy for people without health insurance but sad for women in general. i want my daughter to live in a world where people leave her uterus and possible occupants of said uterus up to her. i still have some hope for my daughter but realistically have aimed my hope at my possible granddaughters.

one step forward and two back?

Friday, November 6

Do Not Dispute These Claims!

1. Sting is a god.

2. Bono is a wonderful, selfless humanitarian.

3. Teenage boys are so easy to raise.

(I don't believe any of that, but I hope it will draw Meme out of the shadows. She hasn't posted here forever . . where is she? Lost in Facebookland?)

Wednesday, November 4

The Other Place

A few days ago I read on the other site a fight saria was having with four. This fight between the two welterweights seems to have an outbreak every other month. It's like the bird flu. Or the swine flu. Or sinus trouble. Are these two really in love, or do they not-so-secretly loathe each other?
Spidey said that they made up, or don't expect another outbreak 'til around December. Just to let you know.

Monday, November 2


I just cleaned out the spam in my queue, and one was "See mackenzie phillips nude!"
I would definitely NOT like to see mackenzie phillips naked.
Which celebrity would you definitely not like to see nude?

Sunday, November 1

"Where's my retarded baby?"

Levi Johnston, the father of Sarah Palin's grandson, said that Palin called her Down's Syndrome son "retarded." Is he just hawking his book deal? Or did she say that? I can't stand Sarah Palin, but I hope she didn't say that.
Evidently he has some other soon-to-be-reveiled info that will not be flattering to Palin.
Is it a slow news day?

Saturday, October 31

one more and then i am done

happy halloween :)

Happy Hollow Wienie

Spidey, thanks for the cute card!

Friday, October 30

What do you do on a rainy evening?

Tuesday, October 27

how could you not love this guy?

"If mom calls, tell her I'm shitting... Son, marriage is about not having to lie about taking a shit." 12:46 PM Oct 26th

Monday, October 26

wedding entrance follow up

I don't know how to post links....
but this is the "divorce" proceedings for wedding entrance video that everyone loved (and spawned The Office wedding party dance.

Friday, October 23

Hey Beanns

I went to DSW tonight for shoes and I couldn't help but wish you were there with me. I had a nice time, but it wasn't the same as having someone willing to openly mock the ugly with me.

Wednesday, October 21

raggedy mandolin

This is Mandolin in her Halloween costume. is having a halloween costume contest and tonight we took this picture and sent it in. I don't care if she wins, i just think she looks cute. what was your favorite thing to dress up as for halloween as a kid? what was your favorite costume for your kids?

The best Osmond

I'm watching Dancing with the Stars and am loving watching Donny Osmond dance. He has such a genuine, unassuming and humorous quality about him. No wonder Bruno wants him!
The professional dancers I love watching:

Derek Hough
Cheryl Burke--she's the absolute best

Monday, October 19

balloon boy

What do you think should happen to Balloon Boy's parents?

Is there no shame?

Are we as a people so caught up in obtaining 15 minutes of fame that all common sense and reason go out the door?

Friday, October 16


have you ever had to deal with someone who just can't seem to learn an important life lesson no matter how many times the same situation pops up and beats them down? I like to think of this situation as a "BCL" situation meaing: bitch can't learn. I usually avoid BCL situations or bluntly say "this is how i see it so do something or stfu." Recently I've made the mistake and allowed a BCL situation to drag on and drag me down, so maybe I'm guilty of BCL too? Earlier tonight I made my stand against the resident BCL sufferer, and I already feel better.

Thursday, October 15


it seems vanda has given up on the other bookshelf and stated that we, over here, on the other side of the world, are still going strong. big surprise????? although it gets quiet on occasion, middle aged old broards don't stop talking. we don't shut up. we talk long after we shouldn't be. and i was thinking about this, a few moments before i read his post...i have had a longer relationship with you lovely ladies than i have with girlfriends in my real life. that might sound sad, but truly is not. i can talk to you when ever i want. you check in when you can. give some encouragement, advice, love and friendship. you don't expect anything from me. i don't have to show up for a lunch date. if i act like a bitch, you forget about it in a few days. if i went missing for a while, you would worry. not that you could do much about it, but someone somewhere would care. and even though you wouldn't know where i live to have the police check if there was a rotting corpse, you still might care a little. and that would be okay. people come and go, but a few remain, and i think that is wonderful. and so to all of the old broards, and we wear the title with pride... love you and thanks.

Wednesday, October 14


Anyone see Capitalism: A Love Story?
It'll finally come tp my neighborhood cinema on Friday.
Will a movie like that have any impact? I'm beginning to think nothing will change Wall Street and the "greed is good" mentality.

Monday, October 12

rush limbaugh

is a F'ing idiot. what a dick.

Sunday, October 11

Food Addictions

Copying Emma's prior post about what are you addicted to . . .

For dinner tonight I made beef gravy. I sauteed some onions, garlic and mushrooms in butter and vege oil. Made a roux with some flour. Added in some sherry, beef stock, a shot of Worcestershire sauce and the chopped up leftovers of the short ribs. Simmered this for a while and then served it over fresh, hot plain white rice and . . . ate myself sick.

My food addiction, the food that I can and will eat until I'm so far beyond full that I make myself sick is fresh white rice with a good gravy or sauce (like the curry I made a few weeks ago which I can't get out of my head). If it's good, I will eat it until I literally cannot eat another bite. If I were bulemic I would puke just to be able to eat more. Knowing this, I rarely make it.

So, what's your food addiction? What's that one food that you have to watch yourself with cuz you just can't stop eating it once you start?

Or am I just a freak?

Saturday, October 10

you gotta watch it again.

Tomato Plants

So . . . how long do tomato plants keep going? My plants have as many new tomatoes on them right now as they've had all Summer. I figure that the season is probably a little longer in the SF Bay Area because we won't actually start having any sort of cold weather that might affect them until November but . . . will they just keep going forever? Or do they die at some point? Go dormant? When do I pull the plug? Help!!!

What are you addicted to?

My husband and I went to Menard's this morning to buy some air conditioner covers. When we went in I told him, "Do not let me to buy anything I have to plant in the ground." He looked at me like, "Yeah, right."
He was looking at electrical equipment so I meandered out to the garden center "by mistake."
SEVENTY FIVE PERCENT OFF OF SHRUBS AND TREES! So I put a beautiful 5 gallon red twig dogwood into the cart. It was only $7.50. It needed a home, right? And I've been wanting a red twig dogwood since forever, right? Now is a perfect time to plant shrubs, right? So I bought it.

Thursday, October 8


my best friend talked me into taking a water aerobics course. The class is one hour long twice a week for six weeks and it was only $26, what a great deal. It's taught by my friend's friend. Everyone else in the class is at least 60. The teacher works us harder because we're young and can do more, but it's actually fun. Something about the water makes the muscle pain take a few days to actually hit though. The other half of the pool has infant/toddler swim lessons at the same time our class is going on and I'm thinking of taking Mandolin. So we do tae bo three times a week, water aerobics twice a week, i do the elliptical at least three times a week and i often take mandolin on 1-2 hours long walks around a lake near my house. I don't think i could possibly do anything more to keep moving. What are you doing to keep active?

be a virtual guest at the wedding tonight

Sunday, October 4

What's your

favorite chicken soup recipe?

Saturday, October 3

Rocky and Rocky II

Encore is having a Rocky marathon for some reason and I watched the original and Rocky II and . . . they were good movies. I haven't seen them forever and had forgotten how good they were.

Friday, October 2

tsk tsk david letterman

big shock from david last night.

not too sure what will come of it,but way to stop the blackmailer in his tracks.

Tuesday, September 29

carve a pumpkin!

Monday, September 28


Today I was at the aquarium with my guy having a nice "us" day. We do this about once a month. We get a sitter and just spend the day together like adult people. Anyway, there were a lot of families at the aquarium and since i like to people watch, it was like crack to an addict. This one family "got" to me. It was an elderly woman, maybe grandma? a middle aged man, possibly dad? and two little boys, one around 3 and one around 8. What struck me (besides the matching family feax football jerseys for the family team, how tacky) was the fact that both boys were on leashes.

I've never liked leashes for kids, as they're kids, not dogs. However, some people swear by them. I could MAYBE and I mean MAYBE see the 3ish kid on a leash, but not a kid that's around 8. If your 8 year old doesn't know not to run off in public, then you're doing something wrong as a parent. My kid is 2, and i know that if I don't watch her like a hawk, she takes off. So what do I do? I watch her like a hawk and then teach her to stay with me. Why do I do this? becaus tha'ts my job. If she does get away, she's punished (we call them "corrections") and she learns not to do it again. When she's being bad, all I have to say is "Do you need a correction?" and she usually snaps back into good behavior. In public, most people are impressed by this. I'm not impressed because she's smarter than a dog, and dogs follow simple commands.

So, not that i've shared my very biased opinion, what's your opinion on kid leashes?

Sunday, September 27

oh halloween!!!

a web site i came across today.

fun fun fun.

Friday, September 25

Old Man Snoring

It's 3:25 am eastern time. I can't sleep because my guy actually snored so loud he woke not only me up, but the baby too. It's been like this all week. How have you broards survived sleeping with someone else for so long? At least I've finally trained him to never touch me when I'm sleeping. We just need a snoring solution now.

Wednesday, September 23


was fantastic. what a fun show. i love kurt.

if you aren't watching.. you should be.

emma :*(

emma! i am sad. I can't log into your blog. :(

Monday, September 21

The only thing left to do

I have a friend who is about to enter the second trimester of her first pregnancy. This is the blanket I want to make for her. I have no idea if the baby is a girl or boy, and she doesn't want to know. What I do know is that she will probably never make it to her child's first birthday because she was diagnosed with kidney cancer a little over a year ago and recently stopped treatment because she found out she was pregnant. She's heard umpteen opinions but not mine, because I didn't feel it was my place to give an opinion. Instead, I'm giving her a blanket and a blessing.


The Emmys were pretty blah this year. I did like Neil Patrick Harris' hosting though.

The opening song was good.
Ricky Gervais was funny.
Katrina and Maksim's dance was good.
Sarah MacLaughin's singing over In Memorium was good.
I think Steve Carell is adorable

I wish Shirley MacLaine would've won for Coco Chanel.
Enough with Glenn Close winning.
Is Kristin Chenoweth a Little Person?
Jon Cryer? JON CRYER??! really
No dresses stood out as really horrible (where's the fun in that?--are celebrities really that horrified of being called out by the Fashion Police?)

Saturday, September 19

Pardon my French

So today, after the little kid party for my daughter's second birthday, all the adults went out to eat. We had a large party of people and some of them were REALLY OLD so we went to the one restaurant that provides the true test of old age, Old Country Buffett. Just by being in there we lowered the mean age a few decades.

Anyway, there were a few tour buses that came through during that time which were full of French people. Now usually, I have no beef with French people. When I was in high school, my mom's job almost made us move to Quebec, where like it or not, we'd be knee deep in French stuff. However, these French people fit EVERY stereotype given to the French. They ignored lines, pushed people out of the way, cursed in nasty voices, pretended not to understand English (those lying rat bastards, they spoke and read english).

My patience was at an end when I was walking Mandolin through the salad line. My kid doesn't eat meat, cheese, or bread/starch, so the salad line is her mainstay at these places. The line clearly began twenty people BEHIND us, but one specific woman was not into queing up, and pushed my baby out of the way to get to the cucumbers. As a side note, in front of me and the baby was my best friend, who actually spent 4 years getting a degree in French and then went off to France to sow some oats. She was excited that the French were among us, because for years she's been telling all of us that the stereotypes are all false. Well, about the time Mandolin hit the floor, I decided to disagree with her assumption.

I lost my religion and my ability to hold my tongue. I love to cuss and have been so good at not doing it until that woman lost what mind she had. I loudly said "How do you say 'Bitch, Please?' in French?" and then pointed at the woman. I'm sure a few other choice words parted my lips, but I can't fully recall, I just know I loudly lost it. About that time, my other best friend pushed herself through the small crowd and we formed a mini wall blocking the salad bar from the heathen French and just glared until the bitch sashayed away. She's lucky she didn't end up wearing her cucumbers, my little sister looked like she was ready to be on an episode of cops today.

For my entire life it was literally beat into me that when you bump into someone in public, you say "sorry" or quickly say something like "oh, that's alright" if the other person said sorry. These people didn't say sorry for a thing, they groaned and then said something along the lines of "you should be sorry" in French, if they said anything at all. I'm not going to return the favor by being the nasty American tourist in their country, but I'd like to point out that they're not the best tourists either.

Friday, September 18


Anybody heard from her? Based on her last post, I'm a little concerned.

Thursday, September 17

I feel Allanesque

But I feel I must acknowledge the death of Mary Travers of Peter Paul and Mary. She had such a lovely voice.

Henry Gibson of Laugh-In and Boston Legal fame died too. As did Myles Brand the rat bastard former Indiana University president who fired Cocah Bob Knight


If women are supposed to be less rational and more emotional at the beginning of our menstrual cycle when the female hormone is at its lowest level, then why isn't it logical to say that, in those few days, women behave the most like the way men behave all month long?

Gloria Steinem

I hate the idea of dinner

Yes, this is a boring topic, but I don't care. What are the last three things you made for dinner (where you or a loved one cooked).

My list:

Lemony Shrimp Scampi (from the lady Emma loves to hate, Melissa D'Arabian. This was a really good dinner, served with broccoli and melon)

Stir fry steak (marinated in soy sauce, garlic) served with onion, red bell pepper, carrots and celery, with jasmine rice

Crockpot lasagna (courtesy of spidey. we ate it for three nights.)

I need ideas.


It's addictive like a candy bar. I mean, it's really good. If someone had told me that an odd, dark comedy mixed in with surrealistic musical numbers would be that infectiously good, I definitely wouldn't have bought it. What a strange and wondrous show.

Wednesday, September 16

kanye wtf?

Thursday, September 10


Ellen DeGeneres is taking over Paula Abdul's spot as AI judge. I think the show will benefit, and that she'll be hilarious (intentionally--unlike Abdul who was just hilariously bizarre)


i am dying to know. did you like your lasagna?

Wednesday, September 9

are you listening america?

pres. obama is stating the facts in his presidential address. are you listening america? are you listening republicans? are you listening insurance companies? are you listening FOX? rush?

fix what doesn't work. wow... who'd of thunk it?

Monday, September 7


I just got back from a 4 day camping trip with my guy, the baby and his brother (my second child). 4 days in a tent on the beach wasn't so bad. We went to the eastern shore of VA and stopped at chincoteague island and the part of assateague in VA on the way back home. It was a long drive, but we had fun and i'm a darker shade of white.

Anyway, early this AM on the way home, I saw a mom-and-pop road side stand that was selling firewood. Normally I'd glance at it and away, as we don't need firewood, but I noticed that this place had recently burnt down. I commented that they're not selling firewood anymore. The little brother called me insensitive (this is rather ironic from a guy with two emotions: hungry and tired) so I asked him why. Apparently as I was contemplating the irony of a firewood store burning down, I missed the large spray painted sign that read "KKK BURNOUT."

So yes, I was rather insensitive. I wasn't shocked that an hour later we passed "Dixiland" a store three feet from the MD line that sells alcohol and tobacco at "discount" prices and happily advertises how sad the owners are at the end of slavery and segregation. What really got me was that when we stopped at a red light and looked at the store, most of the customers were black. After I get my pictures sorted, I'll post the sign for you to see.

obama's speech

On the front page of our paper the other day was a story about this speech. The local school administrators were not going to allow the students to see the broadcast of Obama's speech--labeling it too "political." What a bunch of horseshit. They should be ashamed of themselves.

hope you don't mind urbs

i added you to the blog list.

Sunday, September 6

Who Put

Chanting monks in my classical playlist?

Friday, September 4

Irrational Fears

Emma....your doll picture freaks me out. I hate old fashioned dolls. They are the scariest thing ever.

Wednesday, September 2

Hubby Hubby

Ben & Jerry changed Chubby Hubby to Hubby Hubby to celebrate Vemont's gay marriage. Goof for that company!(Although I don't think Ben & Jerry runs Ben & Jerry's anymore)

Tuesday, September 1


Ever since I was yelled at for letting my white kid have a black babydoll, I've been paying close attention to racism. I can't help it really, it's not like I have tons of other things to think about right now. Anyway, my most recent pet peeve (in a long line of peeves) is pointing out bigotry to someone who thinks they aren't a bigot and having them explain just why THEY aren't a bigot.

For some people, they feel that they aren't bigots because they go to church or do volunteer work etc. My instant response to this is that bigots can go to church and do things that can be considered as good.

Other people play what I like to think of as the "reverse race card." It goes like this "I'm not a bigot because I'm a member of ____________ race." You know, bigotry goes far beyond one race (white) against another (not white). Anyone can hate another person based on race no matter what group the hater belongs to.

Lastly, people try to defend their hate by pointing out that someone else is a bigot too. This often look like this "I can use the 'N' word because so-and-so uses the 'N' word." This misses the point that the "N" word probably shouldn't be used by anyone who isn't a bigot.

I don't want them to explain it, I want them to change it or own it. If you're a bigot, say it, don't hide it. Personally, I'd love it if everyone were open about just what they're a bigot about, that way I know just who to stay away from.

Confession: I can be a bigot at times, I admit it. I dislike religious nuts and have no tolerance for them. I don't care what the religion the nut favors, I dislike them all equally. In fact, religious nuts are some of the biggest bigots out there, so I'm sure our dislike is mutual and this really helps limit my exposure to the group I'm biased against.

the duggars are at it again

baby number 19 on the way. what are they thinking? jim-bob looks like the guy on the enzyte commercial (isn't his name bob too?) with that smile on his face. "i did it again". how does that woman even have a uterus left?

Monday, August 31


Ok, anyone ever broken a rib? I fell in the shower this morning getting ready for work, all my weight fell on my right side on the side of the tub and I heard a snap. Sean had to take me to the ER and yep, I broke my 9th rib. It hurts to breath in, to walk, to turn...
They also did a CT scan to make sure I didn't have internal injuries and that came back ok but they saw a small spot on my liver, could be a fat globule, could also be cancer. Please think STRONG good thoughts that it's not cancer.
Then when we got home Sean went to p/u my pain meds and I got really hot so I got up to get a popscicle and apparently passed out as I ended up coming to lying on the floor. Not good. So this week started out just peachy :(
I was supposed to be going to NYC on Friday and have to reschedule that now obviously as I can't do shit, too much pain. Anyone ever broken a rib and if so, how long did it take to heal and how long were you in pain?

Sunday, August 30


DJ AM died. No word yet as to whether or not DJ FM will take over for him.

Saturday, August 29

a little too quiet around here.

so what are you doing this weekend?

me? i would love to go to old world wisconsin and watch a civil war reenactment, and a speech by abraham lincoln, but it is chilly and rainy.

Thursday, August 27

the office

the best episode ever is playing tonight and i am laughing my hoohoo off.

cafe disco LOL

Wednesday, August 26

This Just In

I read that Kate Gosselin is going to be one of the co-hosts of The View to fill in for that godawful nutjob Elizabeth Hasselbeck.
I just emailed ABC:

"Kate Gosselin to co-host the show . . . . excuse my "French" but ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???????????????
What nitwit made THAT decision?????
Kate Gosselin? Really? Really, ABC??"

Ted Kennedy

Ted Kennedy died today.
He had a long life--most of it pretty happy, I'd guess.
As old Vanda would say, "RIP"

Tuesday, August 25

There you go emma

Monday, August 24

minor amusement

You don't have to have a twitter account to appreciate good tweets. This poster is fun:

Saturday, August 22

New and/or exciting

Anything new and exciting in your life?

Tuesday, August 18

A question

whatever happened to clank? I miss her and wish she'd start coming back.

Dancing with the Stars

In the upcoming season:
Good News: Mark Dascasco will be on it. Who's that you say?---only the cutest man on television. He plays The Chairman's Nephew on the American version of Iron Chef.
Bad News: Asshole poitician Tom DeLay will be on it. Why don't they just let Bernie Madoff out of the joint to do the samba? Blech.

Saturday, August 15

Mixed up

My friend came over to watch tv at my house tonight. I don't watch TV and she does, but she only has basic cable and I have 1000 channels, so it works out. Anyway, she put the news on and it said it was WGN news at 9, but it's 10. Also, we've enver had a WGN. In confusion, we sat and watched it for about 5 minutes wondering why we didn't recognize the news people and pondering their funny accent. All of a sudden, the anchor said "you've been watching Chicago, Illinois local news at 9." Since when does Baltimore, MD get Chicago news? The female anchor said "Ah-mer-can" like Bush but everything else was in the midwestern accent that's just shy of annoying. If you watch tv, did you notice anything like this?

For Emma: Sad Sad Day

Bob Dylan mistaken for a hobo on the 40th anniversary of Woodstock

Friday, August 14


1. Cruelty to animals is a horrible thing.
2. What Michael Vick did in participating in dog fighting was despicable.
3. That said, he paid the price for his crime and did his time so he deserves a fresh start and he should be able to earn a living in his chosen field. Evidentally the Eagles want him. So PETA should just leave him the hell alone. If he screws up again, then go after him full throttle. Until then, let him earn a living.
When did PETA get taken over by rabid a-holes?

Tuesday, August 11

I am

so fucking angry right now. for my birthday I wanted a new fridge. Our old fridge is over 30 years old and it's time fo it to go. My guy bought me a lovely new fridge and they said that it would come on the 11th, but that on the 10th people would come and replace the water line and take away the old one so that on the 11th, the new one could come.

On the 10th, the people brought the new fridge and said they wouldn't be back to get the old one because "they aren't trash men." Yes they said that to my guy. Forget the fact that it's their job to come back, they were just rude. They also didn't care that they were a day early or that the new line MUST go in first. Today, the line guys showed up, said the old line was fine, but that nothing can be done until the old fridge is gone. The store said they'd try to send someone before the end of SEPTEMBER to take the old fridge.

I want them to take the old fridge and put the new one in, like the're supposed to, and I want them to say sorry because THEY MESSED UP, and I want it to be done before seven business days have passed. I don't think this is unrealistic, but it probably won't happen. What I do known to be realistic is that we won't be spending any more money with this company.


any of these yelling people against health care reform have any idea how F'd up our health care system that we have in place is right now? what a bunch of idiots. i see the hoops that need to be jumped through on a daily basis and how insurance companies drag their feet not to pay in a timely manner if at all. it is all BS. the premiums paid to the insurance companies and the claims not paid is ridiculous. the money lost for uninsured people who get treatment but choose not to pay is astronomical. we need a fix.
so turn off fox you dolts and get the facts.

Monday, August 10

This year

My guy and I are blessed financially with the ability for me to stay home this year with the baby (even though she's not a baby anymoe). This is pretty rare these days in my neighborhood, so I feel lucky. I really need a longer beak from work than summer, and Mandolin needs to be with me now more than before. I haven't told the school that I'm not coming back yet, but I just feel so much better now that the decision is final, it's like I can breathe.

Sunday, August 9

The Women

I watched this movie today and, it was okay, not great but the one thing that was remarkable was that Meg Ryan looks like a monster. Way too much collagen and botox. It was distracting because it was so awful and it made me wonder why no-one in her life is telling her that she needs to stop cuz she looks like a monster and why she doesn't see it when she looks in the mirror.

Friday, August 7


Looks like Paula Abdul will not be on American Idol anymore. YAY

Thursday, August 6

Playing for Change

I saw this documentary tonight on a local public TV station and I thought it was wonderful. The director went around the world and had street musicians play well known songs and then put them all together to make one combined version. He also interviewed the musicians about how music is the great equalizer among cultures. I loved the first song they played, which was "Stand by me." The director just found people and said "play this song any way you want to" and recorded it. If you get a chance to see this, do spend the time watching it.

At the start, the director made a good point some of the best music isn't played by someone well known or even celebrated in the media.

Verb, there's a nice group of children singing hyms, and it made me think of you. The Omagh Community Youth Choir, from Northern Ireland. The founder spends some time talking about terrorism and how music helped them move on from a bad incident.

here's a link to go watch the "stand by me" video. A lot of the other musical pieces are easily found on the Internet.

Tuesday, August 4


What's your favorite book to draw inspiration from?

Monday, August 3


Remember Rob and "Amba" of Survivor and The Amazing Race?
They had a daughter:

Thursday, July 30

A Sign

You know you're getting old when you watch a special on TV and after looking at the experts in various technical subjects interviewed for the special you think, "That person is younger than I am...."

Jean Bean's Mom

I thought the Old Broards should know this; Jean posted this on Facebook at about 2:00 pm Pacific time today:

"my mom passed away yesterday at 6:00 pm. I love you mom and I'm going to miss you so much."

Wednesday, July 29


Has the immigration question/problem been solved? Remember last year before the election, you couldn't open a newspaper or turn on a news show without hearing about immigration. When's the last time you heard a news story about it?

Have we stopped hating the brown people coming across the border?

Sunday, July 26

Having The Time of My Life

Tomorrow Mandolin and I are off to the store to buy a potty. I've been putting it off because she hasn't really been ready, and my afraid of an epic battle. I have read a few "how to potty train" books, which my mom made fun of me for. My mom engaged in what she calls the M&M method. Meaning she put us (all of her kids and 2 of her grand kids) on the potty chair in front of the TV after enough juice to kill an elephant. When the kid pees/poops, you give him/her an M&M and a lot of prise. She insisted this method is fool proof as long as one does not ever give M&Ms as a reward for anything else until after potty training is complete. My kid has never had chocolate, so I don't think I'll be following the M&M method myself.

As of last week, Mandolin has begun telling me when she goes in her diaper and asking me to change her. The other day she took a diaper to her dad and said "sorry, I poop." Add this to the fact that she loves to take her diaper off in public (while still fully dressed) and hand it to complete strangers (the gift just keeps on giving). It's time to introduce THE CHAIR. I have no idea which chair is the best and after reading millions of reviews, I think it's really hit or miss on what chair your kids will tolerate. I'm going to just put Mandolin on all the potty chairs at the store and see what she likes, since she has to sit on it. I'm also glad that a few months back I taught her to wash her hands and make her do it often, so that won't be a battle. this can either go easy or hard. I really want something to go easy for a change.

So tell me what did you do to get your kid(s) to go like they've never gone before?

Saturday, July 25


Happy Birthday to our youngest Old Broard!

Friday, July 24

Week's End

What's on tap for this weekend?

Tuesday, July 21

Some of you

(Alex) will be glad to know that I finally got my hair cut much shorter. If I had a camera, I'd show you. The funniest part of the new hair-do was when Stephen (my hair guru) said," It's so spunky!" and I informed him that I'd passed spunky 30 years ago. However, the new haircut has made Dennis frisky...but thankfully I can still out run him :)

Local headline.

Woman vomits in street, hugs tree and falls over in Nazareth
by Michael Buck
Monday July 20, 2009, 1:44 PM
A Moore Township woman and her husband face public drunkenness charges after an incident Friday in Nazareth when they were found stumbling around Broad Street, police said.
Police were summoned about 9:45 p.m to the first block of South Broad Street after a woman reportedly fell out of a bar, police records say.
Judith Fehr, 46, was found hugging a tree after she vomited in the street, police records say. She was heavily intoxicated and unable to speak with police, records say.
After attempting to speak with Fehr, police saw a man standing in the middle of South Broad Street looking at the ground, records say. While cars swerved around the man, who was later identified at Robert Fehr, he told police, "That's my wife, I am looking for her teeth then we're leaving ... my truck is parked on the corner," records say.
The Fehrs were arrested, records say. A preliminary breath test indicated Robert Fehr's blood-alcohol content to be .285 percent and Judith Fehr's was .372 percent, records say.
Robert Fehr resisted when police told him he was under arrest, but decided to comply after police told him he would be shocked with a Taser if he did not, records say. Both were charged by summons with public drunkenness.

Monday, July 20

Harry Potter VI

I went to see the new Harry Potter movie this weekend and . . . found myself bored. I realize that they have to change things and take shortcuts to try to fit it all into a movie slot but, I felt they changed too much and left out too much. Like, SPOILER ALERT, they completely left out the battle scene at the end. Just didn't happen. Kinda bugged me since this is the next to the last. I can't imagine what they'll do with Book 7.

I Love You, Jimmy Carter

Jimmy Carter tells Southern Baptist Convention what they can do with themselves.

And high time, too. They ought to be ashamed of themselves. What would Jesus think of them?

My life is over...

I was doing something in the kitchen when i noticed that it was quiet. My house is rarely quiet so i went looking for Trouble. I found her in her room sitting naked in a large pile of baby powder (she managed to empty the entire bottle) and trying to clean it up with one lone baby wipe she stole from the trash (gag). I'm not overly shocked at the mess, but I was terrified at the attempt to clean it up. Sure, her first attempt at covering her tracks was pure crap, but she's not even two yet. I'm horrified at the thought of what she'll be covering and how well she'll do it by the time she's an adult. We had a short conversation about taking things out of the trash in which she laughed hysterically at her new trick and I resigned myself to years of super detective work and worry. How did all of you old broards do it?

Sunday, July 19


Has died. Condorblues sent me an obit for him. It doesn't give a cause of death. He was in his sixties. RIP, Sassy.

Friday, July 17


I have been having trouble logging onto Blogger and also view this Blog,, it seems to reset itself to a week ago and only when I hit refresh does it come up to the correct date. This IS this week isn't it? I didn't get knocked into next week or last week somehow did I? Was also unable to make any comments- but I guess if you aren't in the same time frame as everyone else, they can't see you anyhow,, right? No news is good news.

Wednesday, July 15


to see if i can post

gack... you are boring

come on ladies! share your exciting summer days. what are you doing? any vacations?
i shared my garden pics with nary a comment. (this is a hint to go look at my pictures) tell me how wonderful they are. even if you don't think so.

me... a staycation. but then i have an empty nest now and can run around buck naked if i want. and if i want to take the chance of drawing attention from bigjoe. if i am so inclined. the other part of the vacation will most likely involve eating and drinking. so why do i need to go anywhere?

i will lay about and read and lay in the sun and drink iced tea and relax. how about you?

Monday, July 13

Dirty Colon?

Are colon cleansing and "digestive health" this year's buzzwords? I've never seen so many colon cleansing products advertised on TV! One has a woman demand of another woman, "ARE YOU THE COLON HEALTH LADY??" I don't know if I'd like that fact to be my claim to fame.

"National Digestive Disease Information Clearinghouse." That is the name of a real institute. Is that accurate or what? "Clearinghouse"?

"Keep your colon clean!" That's my new battle cry.


Saturday, July 11

Burt Reynolds

I just watched "The Longest Yard" -- the original with Burt Reynolds and, he really was a damn fine lookin' man in his heyday (hayday?).

Thursday, July 9

summer reading

Because I promised myself i'd do nothing but care for my child this summer, i've spent a lot of time reading stuff i actually want to read and here are some from this week.
(raiting 1 to 5 with 5 as the highest)

"Come On, People" by bill cosby and alvin poussaint 5
"A People's History of the United Stated 1492-present" by howard zinn 4
"The no-cry potty training solution" by elizabeth pantley 2
"Garden Spells" by Sarah Addison Allen 5
this last one reminded me of Emma and I think she'd like it.

I read the "potato peel pie society" book and loved it, my best friend has it and i don't think i'll be getting it back. I'm going to make another bookstore trip this weekend and see what i can find then. besides verb's zombie book, what's good to get?


the summer doldrums have set in.

Sunday, July 5

Gnomes Hold Better Conversations

Lonely Man Steals Lawn Statues to Talk To

A Japanese man is accused of stealing lawn ornaments to keep him company since both his father and brother died, according to Weird Asia News.

Osamu Kimura, 52, was caught holding a ceramic frog in the front yard of a homeowner, who called police, Weird Asia News reported. When police caught Kimura, he was stealing a 2-foot tall ceramic raccoon, and they found at least 30 ceramic frogs, dogs and raccoons inside his apartment, the story said.

Kimura, who is unemployed, told police he was stealing the lawn ornaments for the past year so he'd have someone to talk to.

Saturday, July 4


A Happy Thanksgiving all of you xxx

Friday, July 3

new blog

haven't you just missed her?

Thursday, July 2


Today I had some time so I watched "American Masters" on Garrison Keillor. It was a wonderful program and if you get the chance, watch it. He can tell a story like no one else.

Yesterday, my guy and I went on a date to see Food, Inc. at a little artsy theatre in Bethesda, MD. Because of last weeks terrible accident on the Metro that killed 9 people, it took us 1.5 hours to get to the theatre, making us miss our movie time, but we had a good time wandering the shops at the row before catching the next showing. The movie was great, so if you get the chance to see it, do. We had a great conversation while on the metro back to the car and all the way home in rush-hour traffic. If you ead "Fastfood Nation"' the movie closely parallels this book, but has some new things and leaves some other stuff out. I wish I had this movie to show my kids earlier this year, it's so much better than "Supersize Me."

I think we'll go see The Cove, about the killing of dolphins, for our day out next month.

jermaine jackson

jermaine was on the today show today with matt. that family is one messed up bunch.
he states that michael was not on any drugs. there was no drug abuse and that his
79 year old mother is perfectly suited to raise 3 young children. that michael had a special gift of curing children with cancer. and that his spirit is at neverland.


Rosie O'Donnell

I know a lot of people don't like her, but here are some of her blog fan questions and her answers in bold. The Chili's thing made me laugh

chili's discontinued the AWESOME BLOSSOM... i am horrified!!!! what do you think?

a huge error
could take the whole company down

did you know that in England to "Trump" means to fart!
how fitting

Holy crap, saw Transformers 2 with my boys. Even with the bells & whistles of IMAX, I must be out of the loop, too.
There's 2 hours I'll never get back...
i so agree

Tuesday, June 30

more confessions from gov.sanford

During more than three hours of interviews over two days at his Statehouse office, Sanford said he is trying to fall back in love with his wife, Jenny, even as he grapples with his deep feelings for Chapur.

this makes me want to barf. he is "trying" to fall back in love with his wife????
do your wife a favor and take your skanky ass back down to argentina and your deep feelings for Chapur. let's see how in love she is with you when your whining ass is down there on a permanent basis and she is washing your smelly underpants. no woman needs any man doing her the favor of falling back in love with her.

you fucking bastard.

Monday, June 29

family records and failure to communicate

On Sunday I went to a funeral for a relative of my guy. His mother's uncle, who was close to 90 and a former ww2 german pow died last week. He was a great man and spent 15 years not knowing his name, so i'm glad he's home now. The funeral service was nice and we had a great time with several dozen of my mil's relatives. Most of them are elderly and in some stage of alzheimer's, so my mil fit right in. I took the time to visit my mil's sister-in-law. She's one of my favorite people from the mil's family. Her grandson, who is 7, has been ill his entire life. I asked about him and she told me they figured out that he has something called Russell-Silver Syndrome. I've never heard of it, but we had a nice chat about my girl and her gradbabies and that was it until earlier today.

Earlier, I looked up russell-silver syndrome because i've never heard of it and all i knew was that it is genetic. Well, after I spent a few minutes reading this site (,
i became aware that my guy had all but one symptom and my daughter has a few more than half. I don't want to self-diagnose, but i felt a light bult and a flash of anger. Here is this genetic disorder that travels in families and my guy and baby might have it. I called a few of the family matriarchs and read them the site, and one dug up the family records and named a few people for several generations who have the same problems the little boy has currently. part ofme wishes we'd had this chat months ago, but the rest of me is just happy we had it now. at our next appointment, i am going to request an evaluation for RSS and see what happens.

Sunday, June 28

Pitchman Billy Mays: Dead

Oxi-Clean Pitchman Dead

(I feel like Allen announcing celebrity deaths)

Saturday, June 27

Everybody say hi to the FBI

My guy is in the process of getting some sort of security clearance for some type of government job for an agency that he hasn't mentioned to me, doing something i don't know about, somewhere i don't know with the possibility of us moving someplace i don't know where or when in the near future. As long as there's no bukah in my future, I'm cool with not knowing the facts, i really don't want to know. If you've never been through the process, for the past few months people at the FBI have been getting into all our personal business. I say ours because they really have been getting into OUR business, not just his. They've been to our neighbors homes, to our jobs, the bank, gone to our friend's homes, dug around the personal business of our families and just about done everything but dig through our trash, but that could be a real possibility at this point. I've concluded that they either think my guy is Ned Falnders (clean as a whistle) or is cooking meth in our shed because of the questions they ask. I have a freind who is a die hard smartass and at one point in her chat with one of the FBI people, she said that my guy was a big time criminal just to mess with the FBI guy. He didn't like that at all apparently and then started in on her and asked her to produce a birth certificate. So, I'm sure someone from the FBI has read this site and we're now all on a terrorist watch list for the political blatherings and all around bitching, but just so you know, there is no meth cooking in the shed.

My State's name has changed from Indiana to NativeAmericana

PROVIDENCE, R.I. – The country's smallest state has the longest official name: "State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations."

A push to drop "Providence Plantations" from that name advanced farther than ever on Thursday when House lawmakers voted 70-3 to let residents decide whether their home should simply be called the "State of Rhode Island." It's an encouraging sign for those who believe the formal name conjures up images of slavery, while opponents argue it's an unnecessary rewriting of history that ignores Rhode Island's tradition of religious liberty and tolerance.

The bill permitting a statewide referendum on the issue next year now heads to the state Senate.

"It's high time for us to recognize that slavery happened on plantations in Rhode Island and decide that we don't want that chapter of our history to be a proud part of our name," said Rep. Joseph Almeida, an African-American lawmaker who sponsored the bill.

Rhode Island's unwieldy name reflects its turbulent colonial history, a state that consisted of multiple and sometimes rival settlements populated by dissidents.

Friday, June 26



Thursday, June 25

michael jackson is reported dead

or in a coma. what a messed up life.

on the bright side, we won't have to look at his nose rotting off of his face anymore.

okay, i don't have alot of sympathy for a child molester.

Oh Lord the Stench! for Once it isn't Republicans!

Something has died in my chimney. I am afraid to open up the flue and find out what it is. We did have chimney swifts nesting in there but I haven't heard them for a few days- they make quite a lot of squeeks and chirps, and if it doesn't creep you out (which it doesn't me) it is sort of homey to listen to. I have a candle burning on the hearth; hope that helps with the odor and you know that I have company coming this weekend of course.

Wednesday, June 24

Hypocrisy, thy name is Republican

Gov. Sanford Admits Having Affair

COLUMBIA, S.C. (June 24) - After going AWOL for seven days, Gov. Mark Sanford admitted Wednesday that he had secretly flown to Argentina to visit a woman with whom he was having an affair. Wiping away tears, he apologized to his wife and four sons and said he will resign as head of the Republican Governors Association.
"I've been unfaithful to my wife," he said in a bombshell news conference in which the 49-year-old governor ruminated aloud with remarkable frankness on God's law, moral absolutes and following one's heart. He said he spent the last five days "crying in Argentina.
Sanford, who in recent months had been mentioned as a possible presidential candidate in 2012, ignored questions about whether he would step down as governor.
At least one state lawmaker called for his resignation. As a congressman, Sanford voted in favor of three of four articles of impeachment against President Bill Clinton, citing the need for "moral legitimacy."

Monday, June 22

anger optimism and the price of fish

is it me or are people angry about everything these days Do you get angry about stuff that in the great scheme of things really doesn't matter any more than the price of cod ten years ago?Are you an angry optimist or a mellow pessimist ?

Sunday, June 21

Fresh Tea

I love tea. I mostly drink ice tea (I have no idea where the "d" went, but we never say it). I hate any swetner in it, and i rarely sweeten hot tea either but like a dash of milk.

Recently, I decided to plant some herbs and make my own tea. This is my project of the week. I have some pretty tea cup planters and a large tea pot planter i got from michaels to be used for my niece's birthday party. They're no longer needed to house dirt cake, but would look cute growing my tea things.

This is a picture I took while at the hardware store buying a picnic table kit. Mandolin takes after me and drinks unsweetened tea. Some old bitch yelled at me for allowing my white daughter to have a black baby doll. Who cares? it's the one she wanted, so it's the one she got.

Have any of you made your own tea? How did it turn out?

I Just Ate a Peach

I went to the farmer's market this morning and bought some tomatoes, lemons (only 49 cents each!) and went past the peaches and I'll tell you what, nothing had ever smelled so good! I don't like peaches. I haven't had a peach in probably twenty years. I think the reason I don't like them is the last one I had was hard. WTF wants to eat a hard, flavorless peach?
Well, these peaches smelled so good that I bought three. I told the woman who took my money, "I don't even LIKE peaches, but these smelled so good I'm buying three!"
I just ate one and it was HEAVENLY. Sweet, ripe and succulent. Heavenly.
What have you eaten lately that surprised you (be clean, mems) :)

Friday, June 19

Thank God It's Over

Today was the last day of school for the year. We should have been out a week ago, the kids have been useless for the past month. This has been the hardest year for me. I started out with a rookie teacher that was replaced around christmas and the replacement was replaced near the end of Feb. This stressed the kid and me out. They were screwed over this year.

So today, right as I was about to leave, replacement #2 asked me for blank copies of all the 4th quarter projects, assignments, warmiups, vocab and lesson plans. I had my purse in my hand and this was a lot to ask for so I asked her why she needed it. Plain as day she said she wanted it for her professional portfolio. FYI teachers keep a portfolios because it's part of hiring and evaluations.

I was so angry. This woman has tested my patience and professionalism. I was rude to her, but I didn't cuss her out like I wanted to. The kids could tell that I was about to losy me religion and were looking for a good fight though. No one really enjoyed being around her. For her time with us, she was consistently late and or missing randomly, refused to make any lesson plans, co-plan or co-teach properly, or grade assignments or control the kids. One of her classes didn't do one assignment since Feb.!

This left me in the position of having to do everything myself. There are two teachers assigned to the class for a reason, it takes two people working together to get it all done. It was a hard stretch, and I didn't take it quietly. There were many meetings with department heads and admins, but in the end, she was a major millstone for me. Thing would have been easier if her main pasttime hadn't been making fun of or insulting the kids to their faces in the middle of class. So today, when she wanted to take MY WORK and put her name on it and put it in her portfolio, I lost it. She must have lost her mind.

Thursday, June 18

Wazzup my females?

Y'all have your thumbs up yer nozes or whut?

Opinions of Chastity becoming Chaz? (I think he must be super brave)

Wednesday, June 17

Iranian Elections

Someone remind me: How are the street riots in Iran the fault of the US?

Tuesday, June 16

Nurse Jackie

Anybody watching?  I think it's wonderful.

I am a bit saddened

That Dave Letterman kowtowed to the moronic supporters of that idiot, Sarah Palin, and apologized.  You should've hung tough, Dave.

Friday, June 12

1000 white women

I've been in a dry spot recently with reading. I've picked several books up, but nothing has kept me. Yesterday a friend told me she finished a book called "One Thousand White Women" and couldn't put it down so tonight I went to the bookstore and bought it.

The book itself is comprised of an intro, a prologue, seven books, a codicile, and epilogue. i am in the middle of the second book and can't put it down. The author writes from the perspective of a woman who was locked into an institution by her rich parents in the late 1800 for being sexually active. She is given the chance to get out of the looney bin and go off west to marry an indian and bear him children and records her observations along the way. A little over 100 years later, a relative back east decides to research his family and sets out to find the truth about his crazy relative and get ahold of her journals. The book is written as if the author had found the journals and is publishing them for all to read.

theis book is loosely based on truth in that the Cheyenne people did ask for 1,000 white women in exchange for 1,000 horses. However, the exchange never took place as Grant, among others, was outraged at the request. The author takes the "what if?" route and tells the stories of all the women who went west. He mixes historical fact with stuff he made up willy-nilly, which must have been fun for him. For a man, the author writes women well and I cannot wait to find out what happens to May Dodd.

i'm glad to have broken my dry spell.

Thursday, June 11

Try to do

Check out these squirrels. I know some of you don't like them....and even I, who normally doesn't like this cheesy stuff, had to smile.
I tried to embed(How the heck do you spell embed?) it, but it didn't seem to work.

prepare for this blog site to explode

Tuesday, June 9

To Kath

Got your card, thank you! :)

Saturday, June 6

Meme Comes Through!! YAY

Love it! (I don't know how to post it as an embedded video)

Thanks Mems


how about an update to your blog!!!!! i am having withdrawal symptoms.

I like this headmaster

Friday, June 5


is anybody out there???

Wednesday, June 3


Twisted Knickers thanks and my nutjob at work

So they announced a change to the staff dresscode at work. No capris, no jeans, no sneakers, no shorts for choaches etc, no open-toed shoes, flip-flops, or sandals. I have never seen so many women in an uproar. It was worse than the other day. They feel insulted on top of cheated.

after a long thought about people feeling worthless, I made my kids write thank you notes to an adult in the building who did something nice for them this year. I then put the cards in the staff mailboxes. I think people would be a little less igh-strung if they knew they really were appreciated, not just the fake half-ass words the admin staff touts at meetings. One kid asked me why teachers didn't write them "thank yous" for being in their classes, so I think I will try and do that sometime soon, just because she asked. I was sad that I had to give a crd writing lesson.

in other news, i am co-teaching with someone who isn't "all there." yesterday she called me in the middle of first period from her home to inform me that she was "working from home." how does one work from home when one is an english teacher in a high school? today i was again teaching the class without her when she walked in and said something negative about me in front of the kids. before i could even breathe, the kids called her out on it.

Monday, June 1

Hard time come again no more

we had emergency union meetings today after school. The government and union are fighting about the contract. They reached a compromise and needed union members to vote on it. Things became almost violent between the yes and no camps. some people said no on the contract believing that we should be happy to have jobs at all or no because they feel we're being screwed. other people are upset that executives got $800,000 bonuses paid by the government a few months back in the name of upholding a legal contract while the government is screwing us out of our rases that were in a contract.

i'm not mad at the no riase aspect of the contract. i'm mad they're fucking with my pension after-the-fact as well as my step level and talking about messing with the health plan. with the step issue, we will all lose experience levels that will set us back years in the long run for retirement. the last time this happened, the board promised that they'd retrograde our levels to the proper place when times were better, but they never did. hence the angry naysayers. my other pet peeve is that the county superintendant will get a 14% raise this year, making his salary go up about 30% in the last three years when he was making well over 6 figures to begin with.

The county threatened us if we didn't vote yes, which pissed the lawyers off no end. They also informed us that if we vote no, we'll be working without a contract next year. I'm of the opinion that the contract is useless because according to state law, the government does not have to uphold contracts signed with state employees. so what's the point of the union? not much. it saves us from getting fired and that's about it. i left the meeting when i got tired of the fighting. my guy and i had a long talk about it all tonight. he voted yes, but didn't feel that it mattered either way, because the government apparently has the right to change agreed upon contracts at will.

Total Eclipse of the Heart: Literal Video Version

Saturday, May 30

Thursday, May 28

thank you

to all of you who wished me a happy birthday. i appreciate that and it did help to make my birthday happy. :) and i guess i won't feel so bad now even though i am eligible for aarp.

Monday, May 25

What's your

least favorite chain restaurant?

I LOATHE Applebees and would rather starve than visit another one again (for many reasons). My second least favorite has to be Don Pablos. There's a reason that it's always empty.

What place remains open and you just can't fiugre out why?

I usually like to go to mom and pop places, but i live in the middle of planned community bliss (eyeroll) which doesn't lead to much real culture or mom and pop goodness, just cardboard-theme-loudmusic-shitonthewalls-hell.

Sunday, May 24

Good news, bad news

Good news:
The Mentalist is being renewed for the fall season, as are The Office, 30 Rock and NCIS.
There is going to be an NCIS spinoff entitled (wait for it . . . .) NCIS: Los Angeles with Chris O'Donnell and LL Cool J. I saw the NCIS episode that premiered the new characters and I wasn't impressed. That blonde long haired chick who played the CSI CSI, then went over to the police side, is going to be the new NCIS leader Macy.

Bad News (for Schell):
My Name is Earl will probably be canceled.

Saturday, May 23

this will come in handy

When you become senile, you won't know it.

Bill Cosby

definition of inappropriate

Convicted child rapist Mary Kay Letourneau is hosting a "Hot for Teacher" night at a bar.
She needs to go away and get some intensive therapy

Friday, May 22

greedy strippers

on my mom's side i have about 35 first cousins, probably more than that, but there are several people i refuse to talk to. one of the males that i like is getting married soon (to a stripper fyi). i said i'd go to the wedding and then persued the gift registry and made a list of what i'd be willing to buy (for white trash, they sure have high ideas of what people should spend on them, why do they need a $200 coffeemaker?).

Today in my mail was an invite to a bridal shower for the bride. Every family bridal shower i've been to has been an occasion to tease the bride and we usually buy gag gifts. for example, one of my sisters is a slob and for her shower, we all bought her cleaning supplies and a kinky french maid's outfit to go with. She also got the standard sex toys etc. However, even though this bride is a stripper (and is VERY pregnant, and yes she's STILL stripping) she asked us all to get her items off the registry, not gag gifts or sex toys/lingerie for the shower as we usually do.

I sat and had a thought and then became miffed. Shouldn't she just be happy that my kin are willing to spend money on her at all at a time when people who were poor at the best of times are really really poor now? I talked to one of my sisters and I decided that If i go to the shower and don't take a gift for the greedy bitch then i'm cheap and if i go to the wedding without a gift, then i'm still cheap. However, i don't like being dictated to about what i will and will not bring someone else or that some newbie can step up and try and change family tradition like that.

the holiday weekend

Doesn't it seem like Memorial Day is way early this year? We have two graduation parties, one bar mitvah, and one 50th bday party. None at my house, but next weekend, we're having a bunch of med students and spouses over for a bbq pot luck, and I still don't have all the pictures on the walls. And right after next weekend, my mom and I are flying to Moline and then renting a car to drive J home from her first year of college. On Facebook, she mentioned that she does and does not want to come home. I understand that ambivalance, but in my heart of hearts, I do wish she was completely excited about being around me 24 hours a day. Who wouldn't? :)

Thursday, May 21

Raising the Ded

Has anyone spoken to Dedlettr recently?  He hasn't appeared on my buddy list in several weeks, maybe even a month, and I'm a little worried.  He may have finally snapped, and moved into that fishing shack on Gay Head with EdwBear, just like they always threatened...

(But seriously, folks, anyone talk to him recently?)

Wednesday, May 20


i have to say, i am quite enjoying the show. there is much entertainment going on. i don't care who wins. danny and lionel sounded great!

Sandwich - Durex Ad

Im so easily amused

Tuesday, May 19


They screwed Kris tonight.  That grossly ugly song of Kara's, plus giving Adam a dramatic choice and making Kris sing the laid-back "What's Going On" did him in.  They just flat decided to give it to Adam.  Jerks.

An interesting website

Do you sometimes read the supposed heights and weights of celebrities, and scratch your head and think "that just doesn't make any sense"?  When someone who is 5'10" claims to weigh 110 pounds, yet doesn't look like a concentration camp victim, it gives me pause.

Anyway, Hallie found this interesting site, where people post photos of themselves on a graph of height and weight.

It certainly can give you a realistic photographic view of what is an appropriate weight for your height, and what a variety of arrangements the human body can come in.  Check it out.

Monday, May 18

Sometimes it happens . . .

The guy I liked won Survivor.

Sunday, May 17

In a nutshell

"President Barack Obama strode head-on Sunday into the stormy abortion debate and told graduates at America's leading Roman Catholic university that both sides must stop demonizing one another.
Obama acknowledged that "no matter how much we want to fudge it ... the fact is that at some level, the views of the two camps are irreconcilable." But he still implored the University of Notre Dame's graduating class and all in the U.S. to stop "reducing those with differing views to caricature. Open hearts. Open minds. Fair-minded words. It's a way of life that always has been the Notre Dame tradition."

Saturday, May 16

From reality to sitcom

Kate and Jon Gosselin is old news . . . . .
The season finale of The Office was Thursday and PAM'S PREGNANT!!!

Friday, May 15

Kate Plus Eight Minus One

I've only seen three episodes, but if you've even seen even one, you'll understand, and perhaps even have empathy with Jon of "Jon & Kate Plus Eight" and his supposed infidelity. Kate The Shrieker. Although, if you have eight kids all under the age of 12, I can understand her shriekiness.
Does this make sense?
And just because you and your spouse have a boatload of kids--does that entitle you to a television show?

Thursday, May 14

urban dictionary

Reader's Block
May 12

Related to Writer's Block, this is when you cannot, for the life of you, pick up a book and read it. Sure, you may be able to read a paragraph or two, or maybe even a page, but you don't retain anything of what you just read or have the attention span and/or will to go on. This is common for those who have ADD, are in possession of garbage literature, or are just so exhausted from having to read so many books during school/college that reading anything else, even for pleasure, has become impossible. To those who love to read, this is worse than heart disease and cancer combined.
Eddie - Hey, man, I see you're reading McCarthy's The Road. Nice.

Nerdlinger - I'm trying to read it, but I got this damn reader's block! I'm 20 pages in but I don't remember anything. Fuck!
I recognise this as something I get more and more often