I have to say, the concept of addiction has always puzzled me. I've never been able to fathom not being able, or just not wanting, to live without something. I mean, don't get me wrong, there are things that I really, really, really don't want to live without but they're things like a washer and dryer, electricity, clean water, etc.
But, tonight I had an incident where I felt a twinge of what it must be like to be an addict. As you all know, I'm diabetic. The single worst problem I've struggled with have been severe leg and foot cramps which are so painful that I had stopped doing a lot of things because of the fear of these cramps. Unfortunately, curbing the activities that I KNOW cause them didn't make them go away completely, it just reduced the incidents.
Then, several months ago I started taking a daily multi-vitamin which claims to be formulated specifically for diabetics. I started taking them because I figured that as I'm getting older, it couldn't hurt to supplement my vitamins, didn't even think about the cramps. But within a few weeks of starting to take them, remarkably, I noticed that I was no longer getting the cramps. At all. Ever. As a result, for the first time in my life I take something faithfully. I'm better about taking the vitamins than I am my diabetes medication.
The vitamins are kinda hard to find so when I find them, I buy everything they have. Well somehow, with work being crazy, the holidays, etc., I ran out on Tuesday. They've been on my list of things to do all week but I kept forgetting. So, tonight I thought of it and ran out to get them before I forgot. I got to the drugstore that I know carries them and . . . went up and down the vitamin aisle four times and . . . they weren't there and, I started having a little bit of a panic attack. I started feeling this crazy anxiety about not being able to find them and how will I get through the rest of the week without them, etc., and about two heartbeats from being really upset I thought I'd check the diabetes care aisle and . . . there they were. Apparently they just moved them. They ahd six boxes and I bought all of them.
Whew. Crisis averted.